I’m guilty of thinking I’m the centre of the universe.
It’s not necessarily a bad thing, with an enormously large amount of what goes on being completely out of my control, me having a focus on what I say and do can be highly beneficial.
Yet thinking exclusively that I’m most important person does put up some big blinders.
I found this out by venturing into Sales from that of IT, the ultimate tool for acquiring as much money as possible. I had convinced myself that I could operate solo and provide for myself and my family such more quickly and efficiently than being tied to a larger organisation as I had in the past. I listen to people to confirm my bias, wrote about it, lived it and breathed it.
With my head held high I walked willingly into a desert I had no idea how to navigate.
Blindly I wandered the desert, finding many mirages that turned out to be nothing as I reached them. I met strange and wonderful people, some who tried to rob me, others tried to help me, some I never want to see again, others I’d like remain connected for a long time.
Yet what I was most blind to was I didn’t go into the desert alone, I took my family along with me. Maddeningly I did my best to ignore them, focussing all on what I get for them, rather than what I giving them, which was being dragged through the desert.
It was in the desert one night, cold and dark, I heard a voice speak:
“Our rewards in life will always be in exact proportion to the amount of consideration we show toward others.”Earl Nightingale
Here I was, 7 months into a fruitless voyage into the desert, dragging my family along for the ride. All because I had put my attention on what I could GET, rather than what I could GIVE. My rewards had been arguments, frustration, heartbreak and sadness.
The next morning I told them all I was sorry, returned back to the land from where I came from and lovingly GAVE to the family I’d ignored exactly what they deserved; a man who wants to do what’s best for the team, rather than for himself.
I don’t wish to slight anyone who is in sales, nor anyone i’ve had previous dealings with (if they ever read these words) I write them only to illustrate a point that going alone is a lonely endeavour. Sure you can go fast, there are plenty of people I’ve met who have done extremely well by going fast by going alone, but I wonder how long it will take before they look for someone to share it with.
I’ve built a career at being a part of a team, and going through the desert made me realise I need to be part of one, not just in a family sense but also in a career one too. I am the kind of person who wants to go far with others, like the amazing founders of The Lazy Society (shameless plug!).
I hope you don’t need to go into the desert to realise what you have or who you might be unconsciously dragging along with you. Sometimes all you need is what you already have.